Super Bowl 50 is just around the corner and it’s so big of a deal that the NFL dropped the ridiculous Roman Numerals and went with a straight “50”. Coldplay will be performing and Beyoncé will join them on stage for what is set to be a great halftime show. You have America’s sweetheart Peyton Manning facing off against the “polarizing” Cam Newton (Dab on Em) in a matchup of literally old vs young. Manning is lined to be the oldest quarterback to start a Super Bowl. A whopping thirteen years older than Cam making this the largest age difference between QBs in Super Bowl history. Everything is pointing to February 7th being a historic Sunday. But, true to form something has to be messed up. And that something is of course commentator, Phil Simms.

 

Shut  up, Phil Simms. For the love of football, shut up.

(Photo by Joseph E. Amaturo)
(Photo by Joseph E. Amaturo)

For those uninitiated or unaware of who Phil Simms is, he is a sports commentator without any sports commentating instincts. It often seems as if he’s not watching the same game as everyone else, and just spouting the first thought that comes to mind when he sees the quarterback make a move. Because to Phil Simms, there is only one player on the field, the quarterback. Super Bowl 50 will be commentated by a man who inspired segments called “S*** Phil Simms Says” around the Internet. Broadcasting the biggest game of the year will be a man who will routinely miss obvious details in the play that just ended, usually because he’s focused on the quarterback, instead of the play happening down field. His commentary can be described as a series of non sequiturs, just statements that have the loosest connections with the play on the turf.

The viewers of Super Bowl 50 would be better off if Simms stayed quiet and let the great Jim Nantz do the broadcast by himself. I’d much rather hear Jim provide a back and forth with himself.  No one needs to hear Nantz try to spoon feed commentary to Simms, only to have him spit it back up like a dribbling newborn. If the commercials aren’t funny this year the one upside is that Simms’ commentary could be so bad that it literally becomes funny.

Here are some gems from just these last 3 weeks that highlight exactly what NBC has submitted its fans too.

“If you’re a player that gets kicked out of this game, you are one word…not very smart”

(PIT vs CIN)

 

“He threw it where he wanted to… That was just a bit off target”

(PIT vs CIN)

 

“As I look at this crowd noise…”

(PIT vs. DEN)

 

“I asked him the other night, ‘don’t you get tired?’ The position he plays, it’s so much running.” –Phil Simms talking about running back Ronnie Hillman

(PIT vs. DEN)

 

“What have you seen out of Brady so far?” –Jim Nantz asks.
“Oh ya know crowd noise is making him throw the ball.” (NE vs. DEN)

“Did anyone recover the football?” after Patriots player Jonathan Freeny clearly recovered the ball and ran 20 yards back to the end zone.

 

Michael Gomez covers the Lakers, MMA and the NFL for MFST you can follow him on Twitter @MichaelGom3

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