The Misery Index: So That’s Murder Then?
The first contestant Phyillicia is introduced. At her 21 first birthday the DJ announced she peed her pants. Larry is later introduced. His wife gave birth at a truck stop because of him. Q and Joe will be Phyillicia partners and Murr and Sal will join Larry.
The contestants are given one low ranking misery index first followed by a higher ranking misery. The object of the round is to guess what the misery your given is above, below or in the middle .
Your dog kills and eats the neighbors bunny ranks 35 as the low and as the high is explosive diarrhea every time you orgasm is at 66. Phyillicia is shown a clip of a woman who went on one date and sent a man 60,000 texts. When things didn’t end well she threatened to kill him. Phyillicia said it was in the middle she was right it ranked 60. She wins $500.
Larry is shown a dad throwing his son in the pool during a swim lesson. The boy sinks like a stone while the father does nothing to help. Larry says it is higher than diarrhea but its actually lower at 44.
Larry must choose which is worse. People for 37 years have been praying in the wrong direction at a mosque. Or a couple tries for four years to get pregnant. When consulting a fertility specialist they are told it was because they were having anal sex. The mosque is what Larry chose it ranked 51 while anal sex was 44. He wins $1,000.
Phyillicia is shown a woman trapped in her bathtub for 5 days straight before neighbors called for help. Or a python in a person’s toilet. She chooses the python at 54 . It was actually the bathtub at 59.
For the elimination round the contestants must rank Sal ruining a couples wedding with a horrible speech. Whoever gets closest wins.
Phyillicia ranked it at 36. Larry at 34 it was actually 42. Phyillicia wins. For the final round and a shot at $30,000 she picks Q as her partner. She must guess the misery index on three different factoids.If she wins she wants to take an African safari trip.
For $5,000 she is shown an Indian doctor removes 232 teeth from a young boys mouth. She must choose within 30 points the right ranking. She places it at 63 to 93. It’s a 65 she wins $5,000.
Second misery is a pensioner robs a bank so he can be arrested to escape his spouse. He gets house arrest for 6 months. Within a 20 point range she puts it at 35 to 55 its 59. She loses the $10,000.
Third and final misery is worth $15,000. A demon child throws a screaming temper tantrum on an 8-hour flight to Newark New Jersey. In a 10 point range she picks 49 to 59 its a 37. She loses the final misery. Her total winnings for the night is $7,500.
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